20th birthday

LMFAO HAHAHAHA! LAST SELFIE BEFORE I TURN TWENTY :P

           

I just turned 20 years old! wow the day went by so fast and now I need to wait for another year to celebrate my birthday again. Isn't unfair that we only get to celebrate our birthday for one day? I wish we can celebrate it for a week. Like instead of calling it birth"day", we can normally greet the celebrant a happy birth"week"! lol. I'm never excited to celebrate my birthday since I turned 17 but during the day itself, I always wish that I can extend it. I need more time to celebrate this special day. Please tell me I'm not the only one who feels this way. haha!

Anyway, Nothing extravaganza happened during my birthday. To be honest, as simple as I may celebrate my birthday, the better. I don't want to throw a big birthday party. I prefer to celebrate my special day with few people who are really close to my heart - which are my family and my close friends. For this year, I get to celebrate my birthday with my mom, dad and my godmother. Since it is a weekday, my siblings couldn't make it because of school and work but that's fine.

Early in the morning, I went to school for enrollment. Then I went to the mall to buy myself a present and a milk tea since I haven't eaten anything the whole day until that night. I dropped by the church because it's a must and a priority. Then we went out for dinner and that is where my cheat meal begun. no. freaking. regrets. Every calorie is worth it. haha! We went to a buffet restaurant and as shallow as it may sound, but I've never felt so special because of the simple cake that they gave me. I like this kind of stuff. Simple yet very moving. :)

I'm so blessed that I get to celebrate my 20th birthday. I wouldn't be able to make it this far if it weren't because of God. Thank you so much Lord for giving me the gift of life. Thank you for giving me another year to fulfill my purpose here on earth. I glorify you Oh God and I love you.

I don't know how to start this post but I'm seriously determined to publish this since it's going to be my last post as a teenager. W!T!F!

I honestly don't know where this post is going. I feel like today is more special than my actual birthday tomorrow. I should be celebrating right now because today is my last day as teenager... and I'm dumbfounded. I know I shouldn't make a big deal out of it but how? We only live once and today is my last day as a nineteen year old. wow. Maybe I'm just bored that's why I find this over whelming (lol) but I cannot help but think back what happened to me all these years. where did my teenage years go? how tf did I spent it? why does everything happened so fast? can we turn back time? ugh.

Sure, I'm more matured now but I feel like I can still use a longer time to stay at this phase of my life. I'm not yet ready to be included in the line of 2. It's not that something has to be changed once I turned twenty but there's something about it that intimidates me. I used to think that people at this phase of their life has got their sh*t together but I was wrong. Everyone is trying to keep up with themselves and trying hard to succeed in life.. and I'm not sure if I'm ready for all of these. I feel anxious and I can't help but doubt my ability to face the real world... or maybe I'm thinking to much?
I really have no idea. Never did I imagined that I can use a Kylie Jenner gif to express myself right now. lol.

As much as I want to do something special today, I guess I don't have any choice but to spend it just like the usual. The rain is pouring like crazy these past few days so I can't go out. I wanted to stay at my grandmother's place but all my cousins are in school. So I guess I'll be spending it alone in my room- watching K dramas, refreshing my timeline and news feed, work out, sleep. Well at least there's no school so I'm good with it. :P

Birth Month

Whaaaaat??? It's already August!! wow I cannot process how fast time goes by! -ber months is fast approaching once again and I don't know what to feel about it, but I'm seriously in awe on how quick this year has been for me.

As you guys all know (or not) August is my birth month. 17th of August 1996 was the exact day I blessed this planet with my presence. lol. kidding. haha! As much as I don't want to care whether my birthday is getting near, my friends has no chill on reminding me. I should be happy since they remember my birthday but I'm so broke right now, I don't have any funds to treat all the people that I'm really thankful of for being part of my life.

*insert Kim So Hyun*

I cannot believe that in 13 days, I'll be saying goodbye to my teenage self. It makes me a little sad because if I'll be asked about the unforgettable memories that I created during my teenage life, I honestly couldn't think of much. All I did during my free time was binge watch korean dramas and fangirl over these goddess actors. By the way, I just finished watching My Love from the Other Star And OMG KIM SOO HYUN WILL YOU MARRY ME. This is the reason why I hate watching korean dramas, it's hard for me to move on and get over with it. Stalking the actors after finishing a drama is guaranteed. ugh. Anyway, besides that, I really can't think of any. Graduating from high school, entering college, meeting new friends, getting (or at least trying) to be a mature young adult, getting fit... these are the only things that I can remember. I feel like I've been missing a lot of things. I think I'm too good to remember any fun "crazy" memories that I did. Though there were few thing that I did or experience for the first time during my teenage year, I believe that it isn't too late, or shall I say it's never too late to experience the thrill of life.

For the last few days of being a 19 year old woman, I... I don't know. I have no plans but to finish all these korean dramas that I missed. It's my first time again to have a break after more than one year of continuous work, so it's the perfect time time to catch up on all the K dramas. haha!

PS: I'm now watching Reply 1988. PARK BO-GUM CAN YOU NOT. I CAN'T. huhuhu!
PSS: tbh, I want to stop watching it already because there were quite a few number of scenes that I find boring but I need to continue it for Park Bo-Gum. He's just too cute I cannot resist!